“Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me— now let me rejoice. Don’t keep looking at my sins. Remove the stain of my guilt. Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me. Do not banish me from your presence, and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.” Psalms 51:7-11 NLT
Welcome to Ash Wednesday.
Yes, David sinned, egregiously. Yes, David got caught, Nathan had to confront the king. Yes he repented, and he was punished by God. And yes, he deserved to die for what he did, but God forgave him.
The story was written for all to see and wrestle with what David did. And yes, this Psalm captures the model, the template for repentance and owning up to our sin. It is difficult to hold the story of what happened in 2 Samuel 11 & 12 while holding the confession of written words in Psalm 51. One could read the heinous acts and think, “I could never do what David did,” but forced to face the stark reality that I am, you are, capable of it and worse!
Then we read the Psalm and feel the deep pain of realization, of recognition that comes with absolute truth – we too are really broken. David called it when he wrote, “For I was born a sinner— yes, from the moment my mother conceived me.” So much for innocence of a child.
Why is it so hard for us to admit it when we’re wrong, we’ve blown it, sinned, made a mistake, even hurt people? Oh, the arrogance of excuses! This is why Psalm 51 isn’t just an old passage from an ancient text written thousands of years ago. It’s timeless because I am still a sinner! It’s beautiful because there is a freedom and a joy in coming to God in filth and him cleaning us with forgiveness and renewing our spirit. This Psalm can be sung as a regular process of resetting our soul, power-cycling our mind, “Create in me a clean heart, O Lord my God. And renew a right spirit within me.” Who God sets free is free indeed!
Prayer
Dad,
It hurts my heart to read about what David did and how far he took it to destroy the lives of so many involved in that story. Then, as I read David’s psalm of penance, I also am saddened in solidarity – this is who I am as well. Today is Ash Wednesday, Lent. I reminded of who I am, what I am without you. So I spend this day walking humbly before you and being thankful for your forgiveness.