Tag: Stubborn

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Missional detour to talk divorce.

Reading Time: 4 minutes

“When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went down to the region of Judea east of the Jordan River. Large crowds followed him there, and he healed their sick. Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?” Matthew‬ ‭19‬:‭1‬-‭3‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Matthew, being a disciple of Christ, and the “disciple of detail,” captures and compares the moments of Jesus’ mission and contrasts that with our incessant need to preserve our loopholes.

We all have our heart detours to get around the principles and the will of God. What do I mean? Matthew clearly tells us that Jesus was busy fulfilling his purpose and mission from God. Jesus stated before, he was here for the sick – and were not talking purely physical illness. “Large crowds followed!” Why? Because humanity has a lot of needs – we suffer! And, Jesus being Jesus, He healed them. On mission – exhausting work, but WORTH IT! The very next scene appears to be in direct conflict with Jesus’ mission. But maybe it’s not?

Religious leaders also show up, but they don’t show up needy or appear to be suffering. They are sick as well, but don’t know it. They come with tests, traps and spiritual controversies. They have obviously thought through their questions carefully, choosing the ones that would catch Jesus conflicting or twisting God’s own rules.

The Pharisees bring up an interesting question, one that is both very old, yet very current even today! DIVORCE. Oh, the learned, crafty men don’t ask about the pain and suffering of divorce. They don’t ask about the division of families or leaving women destitute after the marriage ends. They don’t even talk about the deep shame of relational failure – when one or both men and women have to live with or hide away in their souls. They want to know if it is permissible, if it’s acceptable to get around or get away with breaking one of God’s earliest relationship rules. That’s why Jesus made a quick joke about the question. “Oh, you haven’t read the scriptures,” Jesus says, trying not to smirk a wry smile. Oh, they knew the one Jesus was referring to. The Genesis 2:24 reference, the “leave and cleave” idea, often still used in many marriage ceremonies. The whole idea of marriage between a man and a woman is this idea of becoming one! They are united, together, a beautiful blending of wills and ways in body and soul. One can imagine the pain and suffering after tearing a whole and unified person apart. Physically, it would be excruciating and it would be a miracle if both halves survived. It is as dangerous and rare as separating conjoined twins! However, that’s not what the Pharisee’s were asking. And that’s not what they wanted Jesus to talk about. No, they were more interested in Moses’ loophole around God’s will, His intent in marital relationships.

Moses, the superhero, the patriarch and leader who brought Israel out of slavery. The man who met with God, talked with God and brought the “big-ten” commands of God down from the mountain. It was this Moses that gave the “command,” allowing a bill of divorce. Yep, in Deuteronomy 24:1 Moses writes his own commentary on getting out of a marriage! Of course, Moses had just finished telling the Israelites about the seriousness of making a vow and keeping a promise. But then he immediately tells the men how to get out of their own marriage vow. For starters, Moses may have referred to fraud in the marriage vow, it certainly wasn’t adultery because that was punishable by death! If you read the verse, it does seem very pro-male and disrespectful to women, “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her…”

The Pharisees mistakenly quote Moses’ allowance as a LAW! Jesus, who is the best possible authority on giving truth and commentary about all things, corrects the misinformation that permeated the religious culture in that day. Jesus takes time away from one mission, while the crowd has gathered, seeking and hoping for healing, to another mission. To try to admonish and correct faulty theology and practices of the religious leaders. This was grace extended, to them and corrective truth, to any who would be trying to use the Moses’ loophole to hastily justify divorce and destruction of families.

Jesus spoke right to their own hearts, saying, “Because of your hardness of heart, Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.” Notice the liberal use of “you,” and “your”? It was absolutely true then as it is still today – divorce is awful, messy and expensive for husbands and wives. It is devastating when children are involved. If you, family or friends have been through divorce, you know it’s true. There is no need for shame, but we should quit pretending it’s a good thing, an easy thing. Please don’t minimize or idolize divorce. It’s hard. It’s emotional. It’s traumatic. But it should never be trivialized! I don’t just say this just because it’s true. I say this because I am the product of multiple divorces in my family – both birth family and adoptive family. I count four of them!

Prayer

Dad,
You’ve tried explaining that we hard hearts and stubborn desires to get what we want. But it feels so odd that in this story, Jesus us healing those in pain on one hand and begging people to quit causing pain on the other! We must be quite the oblivious spectacle to look down on. Help us. Forgive us. Thank you that your mercies are new every morning, because we are a big bunch of sin-spenders!

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Advising God?

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“Oh, how great are God’s riches and wisdom and knowledge! How impossible it is for us to understand his decisions and his ways! For who can know the Lord’s thoughts? Who knows enough to give him advice? And who has given him so much that he needs to pay it back? For everything comes from him and exists by his power and is intended for his glory. All glory to him forever! Amen.” ‭‭Romans‬ ‭11‬:‭33‬-‭36‬ ‭NLT‬‬

The Apostle Paul has laid down the long and intense history of how God chose and used Israel to be his own. The Jews were known as the people of God. He led them, blessed them, disciplined them and loved them. Paul makes the point very clear – God is not finished with them. Paul also segues into another fact, God’s intention all along was to bring salvation to the whole world through the Jewish people. This baffled the Jews and pleasantly surprised the Gentiles (non-Jew).

In this discussion, it becomes clear that God has plans and ways that are not just mysterious to us, they don’t make sense at all. I don’t know if you have ever thought about someone else’s decision processes as bad or wrong, but many times we think, “I would not do it that way!” In a puny, Pauline way, he writes, “who knows God’s thoughts?” Or, “who advices God?” Just the thought that God might OWE US for some plan or brilliant idea is ludicrous!

Paul makes this amazing, declarative statement that may bristle and bruise our own fierce human pride, “EVERYTHING that comes from God and exists from his power is intended for his glory!” It is all about God, it always has been, always will be. Just the fact that God has not only decided to create us and love us, to be in a relationship with him; but also, that he has included us, and wants us to engage in his plans is a mind-blowing, mercy-filled idea!

As humans, we can cry, whine, complain or threaten God, but it won’t change who he is or how he works among us. Contrarily, we can also laugh, celebrate and cooperate with him, which still won’t change God, but it will change us. Of course we make the mistake, thinking it IS about us, that we (or I) am the center of the universe, but that is far from the truth. I can understand that when I think about God’s love towards me, I can misunderstand and believe it is about me – but it’s not. It’s about God.

Here’s the real mystery, God designed humans to be fierce, independent, creative and even domineering! Sin has made us take those characteristics and push them to the extreme, making it all about us and keeping those qualities all to ourselves. However, when we submit to God’s grace and receive his forgiveness, it brings us back to his own character of grit, determination, inventive, interdependence and even powerful under his authority. Instead of consuming those traits unto ourselves, we use them to serve, love and protect those who are weak and struggling, those who don’t see God or know him. We become agents of grace to those who do not feel powerful or valued. Of course it’s a choice, God’s will, God’s way or our will, our way? One leads to life, the other death. For me, I’m just not qualified to advise God and for sure I’m not going to be shaking my little fist at him as I slip into the abyss, permanently separated from him! No, I plan to trust and obey – there just is no other way.

Prayer

Dad,
After reading Paul’s words and understanding his point (your truth), I just feel like I must be the most selfish person in the world. Even for one second to think that I know better about running my own life, someone else’s or (big laugh) the world itself. It is so important to keep the perspective of who you are and what you want to accomplish in this world. I choose to submit! I choose to bow and come under your authority and your grace. I bend my heart and knee before you! Your will, your way Oh God!

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God wouldn’t travel with them

Reading Time: 3 minutes 
“Go up to this land that flows with milk and honey. But I will not travel among you, for you are a stubborn and rebellious people. If I did, I would surely destroy you along the way.” When the people heard these stern words, they went into mourning and stopped wearing their jewelry and fine clothes. For the Lord had told Moses to tell them, “You are a stubborn and rebellious people. If I were to travel with you for even a moment, I would destroy you. Remove your jewelry and fine clothes while I decide what to do with you.” So from the time they left Mount Sinai, the Israelites wore no more jewelry or fine clothes.” Exodus‬ ‭33:3-6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

​I’m sorry, but reading this first part reminds me of every long road trip I’ve taken when my children were small. Oh, I wanted to go and I wanted to arrive, but in between… I thought, for sure, one of them was gonna die!

There is SO MUCH going on here in this conversation with Moses and the people of Israel. And, I never forget – we are just like Israel in so many ways. I don’t know what’s going on here with the whole “fashion show” mentality among the people with their jewelry and fancy clothes. If God hated that he must get a real kick out of all our entertainment shows (Oscars, Emmys, Golden Globes & Grammys).

It’s kinda ironically sad that God didn’t want to be seen associating with whatever nonsense the people were into. He was like, “oh, I’m not with them!” It’s pretty strong to say, “if I have to… for even a moment… I’d destroy you.” The people must have been adorned with more than just gold, they were dripping with aires of arrogance. They continued to carry the cultural moniker of “stiff-necked” stubborn people.

Maybe it wasn’t ALL of them, maybe it was just the rich or former royals in the bunch, but it made God angry to be around while they flaunted their sin.

It was an act of mercy for God NOT to travel with them, he literally and physically couldn’t stand the sin and seeing it would mean immediate judgement and justice – no one would survive a trip with God. A regular visit with Moses and a dispatched angel would have to suffice. God was about to lay down some laws, some boundaries to temporarily make it possible to get through ALL OF HISTORY and put up with us until Jesus’ sacrifice and death for sin’s payment once and for all.

PRAYER:

Dad,
I get it. It’s hard to imagine how tolerant your grace and mercy is towards us as humans. It’s hard to grasp how patient you are with our sin. I don’t like my sin either, by the way. I know if the whole scene in the garden were reset and each of us faced the same circumstances we would choose to disobey, and step over the boundaries set to keep us safe and sinless. But you also created us with this drive, this craving of independence, this self will to choose you. And you created us in a war zone, a planet were Satan was thrown down to make his miserable existence. The garden may have been perfect but the earth already had an evil presence just aching to take out his revenge on you. So, yes, I’ve chosen to love you and trust you even when you found me broken in my own sin, unaware that there was a war or that I was at risk of following my own path away from you. However, I also know you’ve chosen me, rescued me and redeemed me. So, I can’t wait to find out what a world without sin even looks like. My imagination can’t even begin to fathom it.