Satisfying the cravings.

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“O God, you are my God; I earnestly search for you. My soul thirsts for you; my whole body longs for you in this parched and weary land where there is no water. I have seen you in your sanctuary and gazed upon your power and glory. Your unfailing love is better than life itself; how I praise you! I will praise you as long as I live, lifting up my hands to you in prayer. You satisfy me more than the richest feast. I will praise you with songs of joy.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭63‬:‭1‬-‭5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

David writes this psalm while running and hiding from the Mad King Saul, in the wilderness of Engedi. The scene in Samuel 24 is right out of Junior High textbook on funny things that happen in life. David and his men are using the caves as a hiding place, and they are deep into the protection of the mountain when Saul just happens to have his troops right outside. But then it turns into a dark comedy because Saul has to relieve himself and it’s not #1, it’s 💩 time. Where better to do your business than in a nice dark and quiet cave, right? And it’s perceived as SAFE.

Unbeknownst to Saul, his son-in-law/successor to the throne is already inside, probably whispering and giggling with the irony of the situation. David has the complete advantage to kill Saul, but refuses to do so. Instead he sneaks up and cuts off a piece of the king’s robe. I don’t know if the cave scene influenced this psalm, but it had to have boosted David’s faith in the middle of a dark season for him.

Instead of David writing about his hopes and dreams for a future as king and all the advantages that come with ruling a nation, he writes about a different longing. He writes about craving God’s presence. And he beautifully writes, “you satisfy me – MORE…” More than a feast. More than finding water in the desert. More than life itself! Can God satisfy the deepest desires of our human heart? We crave a lot of things! Our heart directs us to want things that are not good. Our heart is willing to accept fake knockoffs of experiences and substances to temporarily satisfy or to fill the holes of loneliness, love and loss. And, in those cheap exchanges, which never last, we find only guilt and shame. Shame because we know we reached for a substitute instead of searching for what’s real.

David in his deepest moments of trouble and an overwhelming sense of his lack of control reached for God! His soul reached out and found that God fills the holes, the gaps, the angst with His own presence. It is interesting that David discovered this overwhelming joy in the midst of uncertainty. Contrast that to his future decision when he had need of nothing – but sadly reached for something else, someone else. He saw Bathsheba and he took her. Strong in weakness and weak in strength, what a conundrum. God can satisfy our search in desperation, but can He can also satisfy when our search, our craving, is out of our sin?

Prayer

​Dad,
Searching for you when everything is dark and uncertain is one thing. And I know you are there to satisfy those fears, those agonizing moments of the unknown future. Those desperate times when our brains fill in the blanks with the worst possible outcomes. I know you satisfy, you calm, you center when I am filled with overwhelming emotions and fighting against the waves of a storm that continue to crash upon the shore of my soul.

However, just as critical, are the moments where my heart and mind drift and start seeking elsewhere, looking for something to fill my sin-cravings. Can I depend on you to fill and satisfy me then? I need you just as much when I turn from my disordered desires, and look to you for my deliverance, my rescue. In those moments I want to thirst for you and find joy in you. Thank you for your presence in both moments when I am lacking or distracted by lacking nothing.

Jealous of us?

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“I am saying all this especially for you Gentiles. God has appointed me as the apostle to the Gentiles. I stress this, for I want somehow to make the people of Israel jealous of what you Gentiles have, so I might save some of them.” ‭‭Romans‬ ‭11‬:‭13‬-‭14‬ ‭NLT‬‬

The Apostle Paul, along with Barnabas, are specifically called to the Gentiles, the non-Jewish people. And in that calling, God had given Paul divine insight into both the history of Israel as well as the spiritual journey they have with God. Paul gives the big WHY behind the what! Why would the Jews be jealous?

He’s writing to the churches in Rome, which had both Jews and Gentiles in them. He’s encouraging the new Gentile converts as well as the new Jewish believers who made their decision that Christ was indeed the Messiah. But in this letter, we find a lot of answers to hard questions about the will of God, the law of God and the patience of God.

Earlier, Paul shocks his readers by writing about the Jews, “They were disobedient, so God made salvation available to the Gentiles. But he wanted his own people to become jealous and claim it for themselves.” Now why would any law abiding Jewish person be jealous of a Gentile receiving salvation? Because they not only believed that their special relationship with God gave them privileges (they could do anything they pleased and God would still save them). But, they also believed that it was the law that guaranteed their right standing even if they didn’t keep it.

How’s that possible? They believed the sacrifices they made or the priests made on their behalf covered them and protected them. God had told them, it was not true. God had told them that it was their obedience and their faith that held them in right standing with himself. The jealousy of the Gentiles would come from Israel seeing God’s acceptance and blessing on them specifically because of their faith not in their attempts at keeping the whole law. Paul’s admonishment is for both the Jews and the Gentiles (us).

Paul writes that God is not finished with His special relationship with the Jews. At some point, they will turn and return to God on His terms, not through their stubborn, religious practices. However Paul’s words are also for us Gentiles. We should not be arrogant in this gift of grace! He writes, “So don’t think highly of yourself, but fear what could happen. For if God did not spare the original branches, he won’t spare you either. Notice how God is both kind and severe. He is severe toward those who disobeyed, but kind to you if you continue to trust in his kindness. But if you stop trusting, you also will be cut off.” Vs‬ ‭20‬-‭22‬. Even though our faith is not based nor secured “in the law,” it does not mean that we can take advantage of God’s grace by doing whatever we please and thinking that God just excuses our behavior nor is passive about our sin. Our faith, our relationship is still grounded in obedience and faith. Yes, we sin. But also, yes, we confess that sin. What may seem like ancient commentary to Jewish folks or really old warnings to these new Gentiles coming to faith, is still very true and very important for our faith today!

Prayer

Dad,
I understand that my sin is still serious business, still deathly destructive to me and everyone around me. Your grace and forgiveness are not a “pass” to sin more, but to live in freedom to do what is right. I confess my sin, knowing that you are faithful and just to forgive my sin and clean me up from unrighteousness. For that, I am thankful.

Good Guilt

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“Fools make fun of guilt, but the godly acknowledge it and seek reconciliation.” Proverbs‬ ‭14‬:‭9‬ ‭NLT‬‬

This is a tricky one to translate no matter what version of the Bible you use. The Hebrew words and phrases are deeply embedded in cultural and have nuanced ways of using words in context. Not to get too deep in Hebrew here, because I am a complete novice at this. However, many of the tools to study the Bible are super useful.

There are a few fascinating words used in this text. One is the word, translated in NLT as guilt is the word, asham: offense, guilt. Strong’s concordance straight out translates this as the word “sin,” because it is often used in that way.

Keeping that in mind, the other word is translated as fools but the actual Hebrew word is evil: אֱוִיל. Hold on. That’s not our word evil, it’s a Hebrew word meaning a fool. There are four different words for the word fool in Proverbs and this one is used 19 times. It means to be perverse; (fig.) silly. This person (perverse fool) mocks or scorns guilt, offense or sin, believing it to be useless.

Do you know anyone who has convinced themselves they should not feel guilty for anything because they declare any sense of wrong to be a false moral construct. They believe guilt or sin is a made up, social restraint! This ancient text, the Bible, God’s wisdom, disagrees and WARNS the fool about it. But the upright do not mock guilt they see it as the Hebrew word “ratson,” or “favorable and accept it.” I love the fact that the New Living Translation translates “ratson” into the phrase, “seek reconciliation,” as this idea of favorable acceptance.

We are in a cultural crisis of passive/aggressive behavioral patterns in our relationships and work hard to completely AVOID any perceived confrontation or conflict. This is whether we caused it or were the recipient of it! We are all avoiding reconciliation! We’ve allowed many of our relationships, deep or shallow to become soured and embittered, littered with blame and ghosting.

We are, in fact, playing the Biblical fool by ignoring wisdom’s life giving advice. Wisdom tells me to embrace the offense or guilt, favorably accepting it because, for one, it’s shredding our ability to form and keep healthy relationships. Have I offended or hurt someone? I should own it and say I’M SORRY, and ask for forgiveness. Has someone offended or hurt me? I should see it as an opportunity to value the friendship enough to tell them it hurt! That is still a form of favorably accepting their offense and seeking reconciliation. The aim is to repair, not ignore, to love, not run away.

Love demands that we promptly and maturely handle each other as Christ handles us! God’s wisdom works every time. I need to quit playing the fool, whether it’s my hurtful words towards someone or my bruised ego because of what others said. I want to be godly, to reconcile and restore those relationships I value so much.

Prayer

Dad,
Your Word is truly a lamp for my feet and a light on the path to wisdom and life itself. I am so thankful that you cut through the nonsense of my thinking to confront the brutal facts, the radical candor of how life works. You have designed this life to be experienced in all beauty and wonder and yet I still attempt to manipulate the rules to suit myself. I am humbled by Proverbs and hope to fulfill its intent to make me wise and not play the fool.

What can people do to me?

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“In my distress I prayed to the Lord, and the Lord answered me and set me free. The Lord is for me, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me? Yes, the Lord is for me; he will help me. I will look in triumph at those who hate me. It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in people. It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in princes.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭118‬:‭5‬-‭9‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Psalm 118 opens with David’s bold declaration of trust – “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever.” He had decided to center on who God is and what God wanted to accomplish, not the whirlwind of threats, intentions and plans of his enemies.

After the prophet Nathan had blown up David’s life, confronting him for his triple atrocities – rape, murder and coverup. God then deconstructed his faith, judging him and stripping him of the promises God had made to him when he was a younger man. These Psalms are the rebuilding and reconstruction of a whole new life. Yet, even with this fresh start there were consequences that followed David until the end of his life.

Along with this declaration, came the familiar sense of how powerful God’s will is and how weak are the constant veiled threats of people. Why do we listen to people compared to listening to God? It’s a common, flawed theme, in our lives! David writes out his process that is worth emulating. “In my distress I prayed to the Lord.” Again, how many times do I need to be reminded to go to God FIRST? We hear it, we are quick to encourage others to do it. But why do we wallow and wander in our hearts and ruminate in our minds when it looks like bad things may be heading our way?

David’s answer came quickly, “the Lord answered and set me free.” Wait? Did the threats stop? Did his enemies stop mocking? Did his own family situation just suddenly resolve? No, no and no. Circumstances did not change. David’s perspective, conviction and confidence changed! “The Lord is with me, so I will have no fear.” Then David scripts one of the most powerful narratives in the Bible, “what can man do to me?” NIV translates it, “what can mere mortals do to me?” The Hebrew text says, “What can adam (mankind) do?” Yahweh (Yhvh) is on my side! It is better to take refuge in and trust in Yahweh than people or princes.

David in his very natural, normal process of being confronted by his own sin and failures as a man, a husband and a global leader, decided to receive both consequences AND forgiveness. He begins the slow progress of reconstructing his faith and his life. This is extremely hard to do, right? If you don’t think so then maybe you have not blown your life up and watched the shattered pieces of friends and families have to rebuild their trust in you. David didn’t stay down, he didn’t continue to roll around in the gutter of his past. When God offered a hand to pull him out of the pit of despair, discouragement and depression, David took that hand and let God lift him. No, God didn’t not let him off easy for his sins. David paid dearly through massive loss of his sons and family integrity. Yet, God gave him a chance, a do-over. Psalm 118 is a great model of active repentance and rebuilding a life with God.

Prayer

Dad,
Whew. What a rough read. To go from a happy, singing shepherd boy to giant killer to a global leader. Then, with all that power, wealth and opportunity, to see David cave to his long-battled, selfish lust and desires is so gut-wrenching. He knew better, he should have behaved better, but he didn’t and I’m not beyond making those stupid, selfish mistakes myself. Yet, in your mercy and massive long-suffering, you gave him another chance to get it right. Even then, David had to go through the consequences and climb out of his own darkness and depression to let you forgive and help rebuild his life. Thank your for your mercy and patience over me. I never want to take it for granted.

The priest to represent us all.

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“Every high priest is a man chosen to represent other people in their dealings with God. He presents their gifts to God and offers sacrifices for their sins. And he is able to deal gently with ignorant and wayward people because he himself is subject to the same weaknesses. That is why he must offer sacrifices for his own sins as well as theirs. And no one can become a high priest simply because he wants such an honor. He must be called by God for this work, just as Aaron was. That is why Christ did not honor himself by assuming he could become High Priest. No, he was chosen by God, who said to him, “You are my Son. Today I have become your Father.” ‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭5‬:‭1‬-‭5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Hebrews tells us that, although the position of a high priest was honorable, it cannot be obtained on their own. The high priest must be called and appointed to such a place. The writer mentions two high priests; one Aaron, the other Melchizedek. Aaron was well known in Israel’s history and his involvement in their journey out of Egypt to the promised land. Melchizedek is another matter.

Melchizedek’s sudden appearance and disappearance in the book of Genesis is somewhat mysterious. Abraham presented Melchizedek with a tithe (a tenth) of all the items he had gathered. By this act Abraham indicated that he recognized Melchizedek as a priest who ranked higher spiritually than he. Note, this is all pre-law, pre ten commandments and pre official sacrificial system of expunging sin. Some propose that Melchizedek was actually a pre-incarnate appearance of Jesus Christ. To make things even more interesting, the author of Hebrews writes, “Melchizedek was “without father or mother, without genealogy, without beginning of days or end of life, resembling the Son of God, he remains a priest forever.” The question is whether the author of Hebrews means this actually or figuratively.” Either way, Hebrews tells us that “God said to him [Jesus], “You are a priest forever in the order of Melchizedek.” Hebrews‬ ‭5‬:‭6‬.

What does that have to do with Good Friday, the Easter story, or us for that matter? Well, in a wild, one time event, this is the only time that a high priest (the high priest) gave himself as the atoning sacrifice for sin. Since this high priest was perfect and was God himself, his sacrifice was given once for all time and for every human ever to be created. Jesus did not take his own life, but he did give his own life, allowing men to torture and crucify him on a executioner’s cross.

The story of Easter is really two parts: One, the once and for all sacrifice for our sin and two, the proof that He is God and has power over death itself by coming back to life after three days. His death and resurrection is the critical part of believing, confessing and following Jesus. I believe!

Prayer

Dad,
Not growing up in a religious home and having little experience with church, I only have a book knowledge about priests and their role in the Bible. I am sure that my Catholic friends were given a far greater understanding and appreciation for the priesthood. Even so, I can definitely grasp the concept of someone stepping in and being a substitute for my sin. I do understand Jesus taking my place, my sins, my wrongs and making things right with you, my Holy God. For that and so much more, I am thankful for Jesus’ sacrifice. I now know that the life I lead is because of the work on the cross and the power of resurrection from the dead. I am eternally grateful!

Newsflash Reminder.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

“Once you were dead because of your disobedience and your many sins. You used to live in sin, just like the rest of the world, obeying the devil—the commander of the powers in the unseen world. He is the spirit at work in the hearts of those who refuse to obey God. All of us used to live that way, following the passionate desires and inclinations of our sinful nature. By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, just like everyone else.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭2‬:‭1‬-‭3‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Once you were dead! I don’t know about you, but I remember my disobedience and MANY sins. I wasn’t born a believer. I did not surrender my life to Jesus as a child. I had a fairly high sin-rate in Junior and Senior High School. I agree with the Apostle Paul, I used to live in sin, just like the rest of the world – obeying the devil and the disordered desires of my heart. In fact, I’m not exactly sure I had a decent conscience. I had a twisted view of guilt. Not only did I rarely feel guilty for my decisions and behaviors, I was really good at masking those feelings behind massive blame of others and the crummy chaotic, dysfunctional life I was handed from my parents.

It was those decisions to ignore my conscience where I can clearly see myself being subject to God’s anger – just like everyone else. Being a sinner didn’t make me special or unique at all. In fact it was slowly stripping away the real me that I was trying to push away.

When I look around at the multiple sin-fests on constant display in entertainment, socials and curated news cycles, I must remember Paul’s words. There is a real devil and he’s commanding the powers of unseen world! My heart breaks as I see my friends, family and neighbors swallow the reverse sour-patch candy. First the lies are sweet, by a well crafted design to follow our passionate desires and inclinations, but turn bitter as they produce rotten results.

I pray that God reveals Himself and rescues them, just as He did for me. These verses lead Paul, via the Holy Spirit, to release one of the most powerful truths found in the New Testament. “For it is by grace you are saved, through faith. It is not of yourselves, it is the gift of God.” My path, my decisions, my sin was disrupted and redeemed by that powerful, undeserved grace of God. I will never forget who I was. Yet, I will remember what God can do that for others even today.

Prayer

Dad,
Do it again in those I love! Arrest them by your grace. Hunt them down by your love and mercy, relentlessly pursuing them as you did for me. Lift the blinders from their eyes. Penetrate their hearts with light that shatters the lies that lead them to darkness. Expose the wicked plans against them to reveal your love and true freedom. I ask in Jesus name, Amen.

Forget the bread, what about my boy?

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“Some time later the woman’s son became sick. He grew worse and worse, and finally he died. Then she said to Elijah, “O man of God, what have you done to me? Have you come here to point out my sins and kill my son?” ‭‭1 Kings‬ ‭17‬:‭17‬-‭18‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Shocker, I just found out this past year that the widow mentioned in this story was a Gentile, not a Jew. And the Jewish people reading about the life and times of Elijah did not like it! Luke 4:25-26 and Acts 10:34-35.

There was drought and famine going on and widows had it the worse because they had little to no means to provide on their own. Elijah didn’t just ask her for her last meal, but her son’s as well. You can hear the resignation in the widow’s words, “we’ll eat it and then die.” Obviously no hope there.

Hello! Elijah wasn’t being greedy, he was being obedient. Elijah may have tried to ease the bluntness by asking for a drink of water first. Uh… fail. That wasn’t a smooth segue because of the drought. As she walked away, Elijah threw in the request, “…bring me a bite of bread as well.” Just a bite? I hope you hear the sheer awkwardness of being obedient to God in THE worst kinds of circumstances possible. Are we obedient regardless of what we know, see or sense? Woof.

Elijah gives her a promise, “For this is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: There will always be flour and olive oil left in your containers until the time when the Lord sends rain and the crops grow again!” The widow has just enough faith to be obedient. Promise made, promise kept. The widow provides Elijah room and board while he stays in the village of Zarephath. Why did Elijah stay? Because God told him to “live” there – “Go and live in the village of Zarephath. This next scene is disturbing in so many ways.

The widow’s son gets sick, then dies. The widow blames Elijah for her son’s death because he must be judging her sins. What? Wow. You see the ancient world was simple cause and effect. Someone gets sick, who’s to blame? Someone died, who sinned? God or God’s agents were directly held responsible because they obviously weren’t happy with something. It’s Elijah’s prayer to God that verifies this mindset. “Then Elijah cried out to the Lord, “O Lord my God, why have you brought tragedy to this widow who has opened her home to me, causing her son to die?” Why why why?

God seemed comfortable putting Elijah on the spot with the health and well being of the widow and her son. That’s doesn’t seem fair. The miracle of long lasting bread and oil supply wasn’t enough of an official credential proving that Elijah is a spokesperson for God? Elijah is bold, if not weird, in his prayer and physical application to make sure that God hears him. Was the “stretching himself” out over the child three times necessary? Apparently, the first time didn’t work, so he went for three (“three” may be a significant brain-bookmark for us in the future). God heard, God answered and raised the boy from death to life. Ah, then the widow says confidently… “yep, now I believe you’re from God and God speaks through you.”

God is really into us having faith! God loves us having faith. It is pleasing to him because it completely says “I trust you more than anything else going on in my life.” Faith doesn’t just make God happy, faith is the critical decisions that saves us and is saving us.

Prayer

Dad,
Wow. Both Elijah and the widow shared in the experience of having faith in you. I never saw that before. You asked Elijah to do and say some really tough things and I get the responsibility, but I did not grasp the level of trust that Elijah was exercising in you. It was important wasn’t it. I want to be obedient so badly, but it is ALWAYS diluted by the thought of what others will think when I follow through with what you’ve asked. It feels so much more risky when it comes to the question of “who do I want to please more?” You or people. I have faith, but need more courage!

The lost art of confession.

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat. Interlude Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.” And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone. Interlude” Psalms‬ ‭32‬:‭3‬-‭5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

We, as believers, as the Church, are a reactionary bunch. The Church practically ruined the process of confession by tying it to a sacrament involving a booth of secret exchanges between the sinner and a priest behind a veil. Confession was meant to be given to God and each other, not some mysterious sin eater. Then we bounced to the extreme of never having confession as a normal part of our fellowship and following Jesus in community.

Confession and repentance are not only threaded through the entire fabric of the Bible, they are clearly necessary starting from the beginning of our human existence. If Adam and Even had not blame-shifted responsibility off themselves, and just confessed who knows maybe the consequences or corrections wouldn’t have been as severe. Oh, sin would still be the death sentence that it is. But maybe the burden of labor and provision would be different for men and labor and delivery would be less painful for women?

Obviously David, after committing his heinous crimes, should have come clean before Nathan called him out. Was this refusal to confess before or after the confrontation? I’ve always had the theory that anyone who takes a life or commits violence against another human has to deal with a raging fire of guilt and the fear of getting caught. I imagined that the guilt eats the soul within and turns one into a beast, searing conscience and sucking out all emotion like love or compassion.

This Psalm carries a truth no matter the severity of sin or shame. We are not designed to carry guilt. And, it makes it paradoxically ridiculous when we have such a clear solution and simple option beckoning before us – confess and quit trying to hide it! To whom should we confess? First to God, then to one another.

It’s interesting that David, upon realization, confesses rebellion. Here we thought it was all about lust, objectification of a woman, lying, plotting and executing a murder, then trying to cover it all up. But rebellion? This is what the Bible has been trying to tell us all along. All sin is rebellion against God. It’s us, wanting our own way, not his. It’s yielding to cravings and what Augustine calls our “disordered desires” of what WE want, when we want it and won’t listen to anyone trying to dissuade us. The seven deadly fruits of sin are born from the roots of rebellion.

Whether it was before getting caught or after, David faces his sin, his guilt and the cancer lodged in his soul and vacates it to God. And in that, David finds forgiveness, freedom and a renewed spirit within. It’s not at all formulaic, but it is a process that yields both humility and a fresh start. Of course today, believers are supposed to assume that they are forgiven by Christ’s own permanent payment for sin – and we are. Have we come to believe the humiliation of confession is not necessary. That is not what the New Testament teaches is it? So we just skip the penitence, the humbling of ourselves, the constant admission that we are STILL sinners, saved by grace? Oh, that’s right, we want to heap upon ourselves a whole new layer of religion. The religion of perfection. You may want the perception of sinlessness and the right to judge the world because you are better than others. Not me brother, I know my own heart and it is quite ugly still. Psalm 32 is the perfect psalm for me. I will confess my rebellion to the Lord. And God will forgive me.

Prayer

Dad,
How dare I even for one moment think that Your righteous, Your mercy, Your forgiveness extends to me any privileges of pretense that I would be qualified to judge another, especially deciding who goes to heaven and who goes to hell. I am far too busy dealing with my own sin! I am thankful for confession, repentance and forgiveness as a regular process of keeping my heart and soul clean and clear before you.

The epitome of penitence.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

“Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me— now let me rejoice. Don’t keep looking at my sins. Remove the stain of my guilt. Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me. Do not banish me from your presence, and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭51‬:‭7‬-‭11‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Welcome to Ash Wednesday.

Yes, David sinned, egregiously. Yes, David got caught, Nathan had to confront the king. Yes he repented, and he was punished by God. And yes, he deserved to die for what he did, but God forgave him.

The story was written for all to see and wrestle with what David did. And yes, this Psalm captures the model, the template for repentance and owning up to our sin. It is difficult to hold the story of what happened in 2 Samuel 11 & 12 while holding the confession of written words in Psalm 51. One could read the heinous acts and think, “I could never do what David did,” but forced to face the stark reality that I am, you are, capable of it and worse!

Then we read the Psalm and feel the deep pain of realization, of recognition that comes with absolute truth – we too are really broken. David called it when he wrote, “For I was born a sinner— yes, from the moment my mother conceived me.” So much for innocence of a child.

Why is it so hard for us to admit it when we’re wrong, we’ve blown it, sinned, made a mistake, even hurt people? Oh, the arrogance of excuses! This is why Psalm 51 isn’t just an old passage from an ancient text written thousands of years ago. It’s timeless because I am still a sinner! It’s beautiful because there is a freedom and a joy in coming to God in filth and him cleaning us with forgiveness and renewing our spirit. This Psalm can be sung as a regular process of resetting our soul, power-cycling our mind, “Create in me a clean heart, O Lord my God. And renew a right spirit within me.” Who God sets free is free indeed!

Prayer

Dad,
It hurts my heart to read about what David did and how far he took it to destroy the lives of so many involved in that story. Then, as I read David’s psalm of penance, I also am saddened in solidarity – this is who I am as well. Today is Ash Wednesday, Lent. I reminded of who I am, what I am without you. So I spend this day walking humbly before you and being thankful for your forgiveness.

This is THE way.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

“Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.” ‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭4‬:‭25‬-‭27‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Sounds obvious, simple. Wandering eyes and distracted attention is bound to get you walking into a pole or traffic. Anyone noticed the new pedestrian entitlement? Especially in parking lots. Folks wander, zig-zag and just walk right in front of your car or just keep walking when you’re backing out of a space. There’s a creepy sense that modern cars with cameras and warning systems will auto-stop the car before hitting them. And now that jaywalking is no longer a crime, pedestrians rule the streets! I think some people WANT to get hit just for the insurance money. Sorry for the rant.

Wisdom makes a far more spiritual point using this idea of focusing our eyes so that our feet will follow. The eyes of our heart is our mind. And the things we think about absolutely dictate the direction of our attitudes and behaviors. The idea of fixing our thoughts to control or drive our behaviors is not a new concept in the Bible. Proverbs 23:7 in NKJV begins with, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” The Apostle Paul picks up the idea in Philippians 4:8. “Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” This is wisdom’s way, walk in it.

Proverbs also reminds us that these practices of looking and focusing can keep our feet from following evil. We realize our feet have no sense of desire or cravings, right? Our feet are a symbol of our behaviors, they just obey our eyes and brain telling them where to go. I am still very much reminded of Jesus’ words that the “safe” path is also the narrow one, less popular, more difficult.

Prayer

Dad,
I sure hope my thoughts of you, your Word and your Will dictate my direction! It’s a mental struggle for sure. You call it sin, Paul calls it the flesh (sarx), but boy can it get me or lead me into trouble. It’s hard to fix my eyes on what’s right, good and holy when there are so many stinkin’ shiny objects dangling all around me. No wonder Job says he made a covenant with his eyes! Your Word is the light on my path and the wisdom to choose to walk in it. This is the way.