Tag: Prayer

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Family frustrations and fate.

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“Come quickly, Lord, and answer me, for my depression deepens. Don’t turn away from me, or I will die. Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you. Rescue me from my enemies, Lord; I run to you to hide me. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. May your gracious Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing. For the glory of your name, O Lord, preserve my life. Because of your faithfulness, bring me out of this distress. In your unfailing love, silence all my enemies and destroy all my foes, for I am your servant.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭143‬:‭7‬-‭12‬ ‭NLT‬‬

All of us, at some point in life, have family issues that tear at us. Family disagreements, conflicts and explosive physical violence rock our peace and safety to the core. I mean, where do you go when your home is not safe? How do you sleep, eat and live? A disruptive home rattles everyone and everything.

This Psalm was written while David’s son, Absalom, was not only laying claim to the throne, he also put out the order to kill David! This caused David to run for his own life – again. In this gritty prayer David shows us by example of what and how to pray. Read the whole Psalm. This is recorded for all of Israel and all of us today to know that things can go awry even in a king’s household.

David’s family was no where near perfect, unless you’re describing a perfectly dysfunctional family. David let’s it all out. He’s desperate. He’s depressed. He’s trapped with nowhere to go. He tells God, “you’re all I’ve got!” Ever feel like that? We read the pleas for daily connection with God, “let me hear of your unfailing love each morning.” And he is asking God where to go, what to do next. “Show me. Teach me. Lead me.” Ah, in the abandonment of all hope is the beautiful cry seeking the right way out. What does rock bottom, the floor, eating humble-pie look like? It looks like there is no where left but up and out with God.

Soon after this prayer, Samuel tells us that things very quickly turned around. “When David arrived at Mahanaim, he was warmly greeted by Shobi son of Nahash, who came from Rabbah of the Ammonites, and by Makir son of Ammiel from Lo-debar, and by Barzillai of Gilead from Rogelim. They brought sleeping mats, cooking pots, serving bowls, wheat and barley, flour and roasted grain, beans, lentils, honey, butter, sheep, goats, and cheese for David and those who were with him. For they said, “You must all be very hungry and tired and thirsty after your long march through the wilderness.” ‭‭2 Samuel‬ ‭17‬:‭27‬-‭29‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Sadly, but necessary Absalom was killed by Joab, David’s general. ‭‭2 Samuel‬ ‭18‬:‭14‬ ‭NLT‬‬. And when David finally received word that his son was dead, he wept and wished he had been killed instead. “The king was overcome with emotion. He went up to the room over the gateway and burst into tears. And as he went, he cried, “O my son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you! O Absalom, my son, my son.” ‭‭2 Samuel‬ ‭18‬:‭33‬ ‭NLT‬‬.

Prayer

Dad,
Reading these stories about David, from the humble beginnings to his eventual rise to power and the throne, fascinated me. From the giant-killer moment, to victory in battle, and running from Saul. Then sitting on the throne as king and peace in the land. Either boredom, pride or greed then drives David to becoming a rapist and murderer. I read all about the family dynamics inside the beloved house of David. I did not want to be like him! Sure, I wanted to be a giant killer, but never a king. All that came with being hunted down several times, having multiple wives and the entire mess of his own sons, I didn’t want that at all. David’s whole life was such a paradox! He went down in history as being the most beloved king of Israel but also had the most dysfunctional family ever. And still, through his lineage, through his legacy came the messiah! What a wonderful, messy heritage. Thank you for the recorded insights of what went on in David’s life through the Psalms. It is a gift to anyone who comes from nothing, has a horrible, chaotic path, and still experiences your mercy, your forgiveness. And still becomes a big part in your grand story of saving humanity. Great job God!

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Paul’s neighborly prayer.

Reading Time: 3 minutes

“So we have not stopped praying for you since we first heard about you. We ask God to give you complete knowledge of his will and to give you spiritual wisdom and understanding. Then the way you live will always honor and please the Lord, and your lives will produce every kind of good fruit. All the while, you will grow as you learn to know God better and better.” ‭‭Colossians‬ ‭1‬:‭9‬-‭10‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I’ve been thinking and talking about how to be a neighbor, a good neighbor. I believe it’s all about listening and watching for opportunities, being led by the Holy Spirit. Times where we should see moments that appear to be odd or random as providential not accidental. Those moments could be happen at the grocery store, the gas pump, the quick-serve lunch or while walking through our own neighborhood.

I think it’s important to swap names, introducing ourselves like well-mannered people used to do. I think it’s important to write those names down to be able to do the exact thing that Paul is doing with the folks he met in Colossae. To be able to remember people’s name, because it’s very important for them to be seen and known. The other is to speak their name, before God, in prayer. Then using Paul’s prayer as a template, we can begin to pray for them and trust God for future moments of opportunity to love and serve our new friends.

Paul’s prayer is simple and can be easily memorized. We can ask God to give our neighbor and new friend a complete knowledge of his will, spiritual wisdom and understanding. Then we can pray that God will help them to live a life that honor and pleases God, producing every kind of good fruit (think of the 9 fruits of the Spirit). Then, wanting them to keep going and growing, that they would learn to know God better and better.

This prayer, that Paul prays over Colossae’s community of faith affirms something else I believe. Something simple, but should remind every one of us as believers that we are all responsible for. The word is DISCIPLE. And the thought is BE ONE, MAKE ONE. If we are a disciple, a follower of Jesus, we should be learning about God more and more, just like Paul stated. However, as believers, we should also be doing what Jesus commanded as he left for heaven. We should all be about making disciples. Who are you following, and who is following you? Who are you walking with to strengthen your faith, and, who is walking with you to do the same.

Being a good neighbor has the potential to being a good friend and hopefully that can turn into being a disciple by having someone follow you in your faith. Jesus had a group of 70 following him. Jesus chose to focus on 12 of them. But he specifically mentored 3 of them. This pattern is for all of us who say we are followers of Jesus! Who’s your 70, 12 and 3?

Prayer

Dad,
I am so thankful to not only follow you, but also have several men and women that have poured into my life. Some have discipled me, a few have mentored me. Thank you for Paul’s written pray for the folks in Colossae. It helps me know what to pray for with so many people on my own “neighbor” list as well as those who more closely follow me as I follow Christ. Most of all, thank you for continuing to help me grow and learn in wisdom and understanding, as well as grow in my faith.

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God chats.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

“Hear me as I pray, O Lord. Be merciful and answer me! My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.” And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭27‬:‭7‬-‭8‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Most may think of prayer as a request line. I get it. We’re needy people with some kind of calamity happening somewhere all-the-time. Daniel or Ezra (the scribe) reminds us that prayer is far more than a vending machine or even a confessional booth. The Psalmist records these moments of intimacy, writing “my heart has heard you say.”

As I have grown in my faith, my relationship with God has drastically changed. I slowly spend time in His Word, listening, not rushed, like I’m cramming for a test. Even as I feel the sun or the wind on my face, I am reminded of Him. I hear birds singing and I remember that birds only sing when safe. I recognize that I can do the same, because I am safe in His presence.

Now, whether I hear the sweet whispers inviting me to come or I just grab a few moments and let Him know what I am feeling or how grateful I am for His love. I either answer like the Psalmist, “Lord, I am coming,” or announce to Him, “Lord, here I come.” It is such a sweet conversation when there’s no real agenda. It has to be very much like Adam who walked with God in the cool of the evening. Prayer can take me back (or even forward) to Eden, when innocence and wonder fill our days.

Walking with my grandgirls as toddlers, I remember their curiousness and questions that stopped us every few steps. I was just happy to be with them, watching them grow in their understanding of this world. It is interesting to think that prayer, chats with God, may come to a point that we are conversing more than giving or receiving. That I just want to spend time with God and without needing anything but Him in those moments. I see those moments, those days ahead and I am excited to say, “Lord, I am coming.”

Prayer

Dad,
I think that spending time with you in your Word has brought an anchor to my restless soul, a place of calm delight. A place to not just be challenged, but cherished by the Holy Spirit. I’ve enjoyed these moments and it has allowed me to take time to remember to just talk over things with you. Sure, much of it is handing over the mundane mire of minutia happening far too often. However, it is also a time of opening up, softening up my soul to just chat about anything and everything with you. For this, I am thankful.

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Warrior Moms.

Reading Time: 4 minutes 
“Then Hannah prayed: “My heart rejoices in the Lord! The Lord has made me strong. Now I have an answer for my enemies; I rejoice because you rescued me. No one is holy like the Lord! There is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God.” 1 Samuel‬ ‭2‬:‭1‬-‭2‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Then Hannah prayed. And the floodgates, bound up by angst and anticipation, burst out of her soul. Like a dam that had reached its maximum capacity. She either opens her soul to God or her heart would burst from holding in years of thoughts and emotions.

Who knew this girl had it in her? This is how it goes with quiet folk. It seems there is not much going on. They are quiet, keeping mostly to themselves and speak very little. The thought is, “they just don’t have anything to say.” Oh, but Hannah had words! Stored up words.

Moments of time and frustrations that had passed, it was all packed in tightly in her heart. Samuel tells us how hard it was for his mother, “Year after year it was the same—Peninnah would taunt Hannah as they went to the Tabernacle. Each time, Hannah would be reduced to tears and would not even eat. “Why are you crying, Hannah?” Elkanah would ask. “Why aren’t you eating? Why be downhearted just because you have no children? You have me—isn’t that better than having ten sons?” Her husband, asks her why? why? why? Aren’t I enough? Oh, poor Elkanah, he had no idea of what was going on. And, most of the time, I don’t know what’s really going on in my wife’s heart either (nor her knowing mine).

It’s recorded that Hannah speaks out twice, and briefly, early in the story. She pours out her soul before God in the tabernacle, the place God would visit from time to time. She says, “O Lord of Heaven’s Armies, if you will look upon my sorrow and answer my prayer and give me a son, then I will give him back to you. He will be yours for his entire lifetime, and as a sign that he has been dedicated to the Lord, his hair will never be cut.” Did you read that? It starts like a warrior’s prayer! The second time Hannah speaks out, it’s both respectful and humble – even though Eli did not deserve respect, she gave it anyways.

You need to know a couple of oddities about Eli at this time. One, Samuel tells us that Eli was sitting in his normal spot at the entrance to the tabernacle. Strangely, there are no chairs on the list of items that God wanted in the tabernacle. Why was Eli sitting? Two, Eli doesn’t recognize an earnest prayer before God and mistakes Hannah’s cries as drunkenness! Had there not been anyone emotionally expressing themselves before God in that place? Or was Eli so uncomfortable with such emotions that he would rather believe it was because of booze? Three, by the way, Eli died sitting in a chair! (1 Samuel 4:18, “Eli fell backward from his seat beside the gate. He broke his neck and died, for he was old and overweight.) Back to Hannah.

“Oh no, sir!” she replied. “I haven’t been drinking wine or anything stronger. But I am very discouraged, and I was pouring out my heart to the Lord. Don’t think I am a wicked woman! For I have been praying out of great anguish and sorrow.””

God grants her favor and gives her a son. Several years later, after Samuel is born and weaned, Hannah keeps her promise and brings little Samuel to the tabernacle and allows Eli to adopt him as a guardian. After Elkanah and Hannah dedicate their son to God and present sacrifices as a thanksgiving offering, Hannah let’s this magnificent prayer loose. This intense, raw, prayer comes gushing out. This prayer is the echo, a second stanza to the first prayer she began with when she asked God for favor to give her a son.

“My heart,” she says, “rejoices! the Lord has made me STRONG.” Watch out enemies. Shut your mouth, sister Peninnah. How dare you mock me in my suffering and how dare you doubt that God would grant me my heart’s desire! Hannah was no longer quiet. Hannah was no longer pitied. Hannah was now a WARRIOR MOM!

Now more than ever we need warrior moms. Moms and grand-moms that are sick of being mocked about unanswered prayers and unfulfilled godly desires! Moms that cry out to God “O Lord of Heaven’s Armies, if you will look upon my sorrow and answer my prayer and give me… my son back, my daughter back, my grandchildren back. That they would come home, returning to you Oh Lord of Hosts!”

Warrior moms pray and God hears and works miracles on their behalf. Moms, don’t let Peninnahs’, Elkanahs’ or Elis’ mock you, distract you or stop you from getting your prayers up and out to God. Be strong. Pray strong.

Prayer

Dad,
I may not be a mom, but I can recognize a warrior mom who boldly asks, seeks, knocks and relentlessly, patiently comes before you in faith! I don’t know if you have favorite prayers from favorite people, but I somehow believe these warrior mom prayers get the attention of heaven and priority in your grace. All that I ask is that you ANSWER these prayers. On behalf of the tears shed for a generation of lost sons and daughters – please ANSWER these prayers.

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Cave Prayers.

Reading Time: 2 minutes 
“I cry out to the Lord; I plead for the Lord’s mercy. I pour out my complaints before him and tell him all my troubles. When I am overwhelmed, you alone know the way I should turn. Wherever I go, my enemies have set traps for me. I look for someone to come and help me, but no one gives me a passing thought! No one will help me; no one cares a bit what happens to me.” Psalms‬ ‭142:1-4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

This is David’s prayer as he’s running for his life, being hunted down and most of all hiding in caves. This guy eventually goes from caves to being King! These cave prayers capture his helplessness and hopelessness. He sees no path that reflects the fact that Samuel (Samuel 16:1) has anointed him as future king of Israel. The first part of these anguished prayers are filled with cathartic venting. The endings come around to recognize that God is still there and very much desired, “Then I pray to you, O Lord. I say, “You are my place of refuge. You are all I really want in life.”

How many times have told God, “you are really all I want, all I need in this life?” Oh I have. I certainly have prayed this way under duress and dark times. And, it’s true, God is all I need. In good times, times of blessing and favor, this prayer comes out as gratefulness. I experience these moments of remembering where I came from – in chaos and obscurity to where God has brought me – family and a good name.

Doesn’t everyone NEED some cave time, along with cave prayers? We would never invite it, but shouldn’t we welcome it when it comes along? Cave prayers reveal our dependency, our humanity and humility. Cave prayers position us in suffering and force us to recognize God in a way that courts, kingship and abundance cannot. Cave prayers reveal our hearts and intentions, showing us our surroundings and admitting our need for God’s presence. It takes a cave to flip our view of our future. Instead of seeing those who pursue us, we see God who surrounds us with His peace. Instead of seeing our own dreams and aspirations, we can only see God as He comforts us.

I am not currently in a cave, but I remember when I was. A few times in my life when I felt completely alone and crushed by the darkness of those cave moments. I felt like the life I had known was gone and I could not see anything ahead in my future. Yet, God was there with me, right-there-with-me.

Prayer

​Dad,
There is no way I can say that I liked my own cave time. I did not enjoy the loss of senses, direction or future. However, I did like the very cozy comfort of your presence, knowing that I was completely in your care, dependent on you in every way. And, like David, I realized that you were truly all I need.

I am enjoying gratitude much more than looking back than the dark desperation trying to look forward. I need a daily reminder of your presence, your will, and your ways. When I can get my heart and mind into that place of peace and assurance that you have all things under control and surrender to you, I can feel responsibilities, ToDo lists, even minutiae lift off my shoulders.

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Praying with a woke mind and grateful heart.

Reading Time: 2 minutes 
“Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart. Pray for us, too, that God will give us many opportunities to speak about his mysterious plan concerning Christ. That is why I am here in chains. Pray that I will proclaim this message as clearly as I should.” Colossians‬ ‭4:2-4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

If I don’t like the things happening all around me, I should PRAY. Paul’s admonition to the churches (and us) – PRAY! I’ve been practicing this evening and morning routine of giving everything to God just before I sleep and right after opening my eyes in the morning. No checking late night texts or early emails. And, to have an alert mind and thankful heart.

Paul uses this Greek word only used here in the New Testament, grēgoreúō – to be vigilantly woke. No kidding! Believers need to be woke in prayer. That coupled with a “eucharistos” heart – a well favored, grace-filled heart is a powerful way to approach any situation on any given day. Paul then not only encourages this prayer posture in tough times, he asks for MORE opportunities himself – while in prison! It’s as if Paul is wanting more woke gratitude to leverage it to even more effectiveness in his witness.

He asks for more ways to speak these mysteries, these secret, hidden without a Spirit initiated revelation moments with people. Paul, this giant of evangelism in the first century wants and prays to be even more clear about the gospel, speaking to the hearts of humans that God has already been working on.

With the Holy Spirit at work there is no such thing as a “cold call” when talking to someone! God has already been wooing and working on every possible way to reach them with His love, grace and forgiveness. These perceived serendipitous moments are divine appointments. Paul understood this and asked the churches to pray with him for more of those moments.

Do I pray that way? Mostly I am OVER concerned with my own agendas, frustrations and fears. My prayers have no room, even with woke gratefulness, to ask for more opportunities to share about Christ. I need to hear Paul’s humble admonishment and leave a little room for these supernatural moments of opportunity!

Prayer

Dad,
Wow, when reading Paul’s words, inspired of the Holy Spirit, I feel the embarrassment and challenge to not be so protectively selfish in my prayers. Of course, I am only thinking of what presses in on my mind. But I can leave a little bit, just the edges of my brain-field for these mysterious moments Paul wrote about. Help me not be completely consumed by my own agenda that I forget your BIG agenda for all of us who follow Jesus.

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Oh the persistence of a well loved child!

Reading Time: 2 minutes 
“You fathers—if your children ask for a fish, do you give them a snake instead? Or if they ask for an egg, do you give them a scorpion? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him.” Luke‬ ‭11:11-13‬ ‭NLT‬‬

No one knows persistence like a loved child! Warning: Grandchild story. Our three granddaughters are three and under. Once our grands get something they want in their heads, there is no shaking them off topic. If I happen to mention a special treat for them, the oldest is immediately working her charm. It’s starts with the sweetest of asks, “Papa, do you remember the treat you promised?” “Yes, but let’s wait until after dinner,” I say. Scattered throughout dinner are regular checkins both verbal and non-verbal. A increasingly more direct message, “Papa, remember.” Even though the oldest does the heavy lifting to remind, to maintain this gentle, but constant pressure of THE ASK, it is clear that she is asking for all three of them. And somehow our twenty-two month and our seventeen month old have their brilliant listening skills honed well before their verbal acumen. Now it’s all three staring me down. They remember, they ask and ask again.

It’s not only appropriate because it was promised, it’s adorable because they know that I will come through with the request. How could I not? And the fulfillment of a promise, a resolve of the persistence is complete – Papa serves all three of them with the treat! All is right with the world. A promise made, a persistent reminder is applied and most importantly a promise is kept. Jesus, teaching on how to pray leads off with the warmest, most affectionate way possible… “Our Father.” Then he ends with a good father story. You dads, if your children ask… well Jesus knew, we know, that sums up just about every toddler, preschooler persona – it’s more like WHEN your children ask!

Setting aside all the “Dad jokes,” teasing and ill-timed humor. GIVING good gifts is all that every good Dad wants to do. So, maybe we should come to our heavenly Dad much more preschoolish than we do. “Good God, I’m asking and I know you always keep your promises and want to give great gifts, I just want to remind you that I am waiting, believing and dependent on you.”

Prayer

Dad,
Jesus couldn’t have made it more clear. You love to be asked and love to give good gifts to your own. I’m asking for some pretty BIG gifts. Oh, they are not for me. Like my oldest granddaughter asking for her sister and cousin, I’m asking for my family and friends. I don’t mind reminding you that I am waiting and trusting you for the results.

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Going to God first, BEFORE we spin out.

Reading Time: 2 minutes 
“O Lord, don’t rebuke me in your anger or discipline me in your rage. Have compassion on me, Lord, for I am weak. Heal me, Lord, for my bones are in agony. I am sick at heart. How long, O Lord, until you restore me? Return, O Lord, and rescue me. Save me because of your unfailing love. For the dead do not remember you. Who can praise you from the grave?” Psalms‬ ‭6:1-5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

David implores God to restore, not continue to rebuke. To heal, not to discipline as David sees it. I realize this is probably David’s general outlook or worldview. EVERYTHING that happens, good or bad, comes from God. Interesting right? I don’t see David blaming natural consequences per se, or an evil presence such as Satan when things are going bad. I don’t even see him really blaming King Saul or evil men. He’s really got his focus on God’s design and desire to control all that happens in his life and the kingdom life. Why else would David constantly remind God of how long he’s been waiting for justice?

In this passage David dramatically reminds God of something else. How can I praise you of I’m no longer alive? Who praises from the grave? Well… I get his point. We would rather praise and tell of God’s great mercy here, while we’re alive in this planet, while there are people to hear the testimonies of His goodness. However, from a eternal perspective, God will always receive praise, even from the beyond. I’m not sure about the ancients view of the afterlife. David uses the word, “sheol.” Which is a realm of the dead, where all the dead go. He certainly did not believe he could continue to give God praise from there.

What would happen if I took my griefs, failures and frustrations to God FIRST? If I had this kind of open conversation with God at the front of my tendency to “spin” or ruminate? I just had this happen. And I was feeling desperate to tell someone what I had experienced, what I was feeling AND let those awful theories take my brain off to a hundred different directions. The one I should have talked to first, was God. The Psalms always reminds me to do this, that’s what I love about these songs and poems. But I still don’t choose God first! It’s very annoying that I do this.

Prayer

Dad,
Even though you have given me access and permission to go to you, to approach you, I still have a difficult time following through. Maybe it’s just me? Maybe everyone else just does this automatically. I even had the perfect yucky day yesterday and was wishing I could tell someone to get it out of my head, but oh no, I didn’t pray a peep! I didn’t let you in. I didn’t reach out for help to sort through the pain and disappointment. I do remember pausing before I sent some dumb texts that would have made things worse. I need you so badly when things are stressful and I start dropping or forgetting important things I’m supposed to get done.

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Backing away from the mental edge of a cliff.

Reading Time: 2 minutes 
“Rescue me from my enemies, O God. Protect me from those who have come to destroy me. Rescue me from these criminals; save me from these murderers.” Psalms‬ ‭59:1-2‬ ‭NLT‬‬

How to pray when you’re attacked! David knew how to bring his honest, earnest thoughts, fears and prayers to God. Again, how many of us talk with God with such specificity? David lists their methods of stalking and trash talking. “They come out at night, snarling like vicious dogs as they prowl the streets. Listen to the filth that comes from their mouths; their words cut like swords. “After all, who can hear us?” they sneer.” Isn’t it interesting that David KNOWS that God hears his prayer, but also hears the profane disregard for decency of the thugs that work for King Saul.

David also asks God to NOT kill them, but to throw them off balance, “Don’t kill them, for my people soon forget such lessons; stagger them with your power, and bring them to their knees, O Lord our shield.”

But while all of this is going on, even amidst the prayer for protection, David decides to behave in a very specific way. He decides, “But as for me, I will sing about your power. Each morning I will sing with joy about your unfailing love. For you have been my refuge, a place of safety when I am in distress. O my Strength, to you I sing praises, for you, O God, are my refuge, the God who shows me unfailing love.” He sings about God’s power, not the thugs. He starts his day by singing with joy about God’s unfailing (secure) love! David owns his attitude and sets his behavior everyday that he is going through this incredible pressure of being hunted down by the King. This is a lesson for me, for us when we feel that we are under the threat and pressure of attacks – real or perceived!

Prayer

​Dad,
You know that when I am feeling out of control or certainly under any kind of attack, that my mind obsesses, for days, over the possible negative endings. And if it feels like an unjustified correction or complaint against me – it just sends me spiraling.

I’ve have tried and tried to shorten the amount of time it takes me to gain my mental footing and talk myself back into anything healthy. David met his enemies both external (the thugs) and internal (his own fears) with a very practical action – he prayed, he sang. He reminded himself of who YOU are and then sang about how trustworthy you are until joy and a sense of peace brought him back from the brink of that mental cliff.

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How is your family name and legacy doing?

Reading Time: 3 minutes 
“The proverbs of Solomon: A wise child brings joy to a father; a foolish child brings grief to a mother.” Proverbs‬ ‭10:1‬ ‭NLT‬‬

There are a number of these son to parent proverbs. Modern translations substitute “child” for son, but that undermines the purpose of these writings. If Tim Keller is right, and I believe he is, he says that the proverbs were written as curriculum training for young men. This isn’t a put down on young girls or women in general. It was poignantly written to train boys to become great men – nothing wrong with that, right? We do want our boys to become great men, correct?

Think of this curricula idea being drilled into every Hebrew boy – your decisions effect MORE than just yourself. A constant theme of respect and family responsibility towards their own parents. I was given no such training, no such purpose, no such direction. Yet, even with zero input from my own fathers on how to be man, a husband or a father, I personally learned from God, from Proverbs one of the foundational necessities of life – get wisdom!

By the time Robin and I had children I was able to give regular and constant reminders to all three of our children about this proverb right here – “be wise” and it will bring us ALL joy. Be wise and you will have what is necessary to live a good life, influence every single person you meet and leave a legacy for our family. I didn’t quote the verse to them, I lived it with them. I was adopted, so my birth name is Spear, but when my last name changed at four years old, I grew up understanding that my own adopted father had trashed his family name.

When Christ rescued and redeemed my life, I spent time absorbing the wisdom of God through Proverbs, I instinctively knew my responsibility- clean up the family name and pass it on to my children in good standing. I have worked so very hard to rebuild the Garvin name in every way possible. I wanted it to be morally sound, fiscally sound, socially sound and every bit spiritually sound. I wanted my children to be proud of their father’s name and even more proud of the work God had done to restore that name. Garvin would come to mean, faithful, funny, hopeful, caring, responsible and respectful. I told each one of my children to remember they are a Garvin and to be proud of it!

I know of families who bear the grief of a tarnished name, especially when both parents tried to live godly lives, and raised their children the best way they knew how. There is no shame or judgment towards my friends, I have known them our entire adult lives. But I do know the shadow that their own children have cast on their family reputation.

I also know something else. God’s stories are very long and prayer still works. A momma’s prayer, a daddy’s prayer can move mountains and shake the heavens to bring about change in the hearts of our children. So like the prodigal father who waits, everyday looking for his son to come home, so I know that there can be a “come to their senses” and a desire to return home. Angry words towards and bitter images of our prodigals will not bring them home. However, a godly prayer and prophetically seeing a redeemed image of possibility will yield a huge hug and welcome home party someday. How important is it to raise a child in the wisdom of God? The difference between great joy or great grief in all of our futures!

Prayer:

Dad,
My job, our job is not done even though our children are grown. We still influence them and their decisions. They still need us to speak godly wisdom into their lives. Plus, we now get to focus on our grandchildren and not only reinforce what the parents may say, but put our own special touch of grand wisdom and love into their lives as well. Many a child have rejected a parents advice but still hold to the love of their grandparents. Help us continue to give our family your grace and wisdom to leave a godly legacy!